I am literally going crazy over here. I am stressed to the max; I am snapping at my best friends, I am having mini breakdowns in stores, I am second guessing myself.
This is wedding taper...the crazies set in. This is far worse than Bride brain. Add regular taper on top and my mind is running wild!
I have learned in the last few weeks that sitting and staring at a spreadsheet does not actually get anything done. I have learned that you have to actually go out and do things. You have to make decisions and move on. Live with the outcome - good or bad.
I have learned that wedding planning is like marathon (or for me half marathon and 15k) training!
Sitting on the couch staring at the training plan will not make me a faster runner, just like sitting on the couch staring at my wedding spreadsheet does not get me any closer to crossing off all my "to dos".
I have to get out there and do things! I have to get up early and run my workout and do my best. I have to make decisions and be happy with them and NOT second guess myself. When I put in the work and time, I know that the outcome will be the best it can be.
And the important thing for me to remember is that my wedding is a snapshot of who I am on September 10th, 2011. My decisions were made because this is what I like right now! I don't need to think about the future or think "will I look back and think this is tacky?" NO - this is who I am now at this point in my life and everything will reflect that.
Just like running a race - at the time of the start, I am the runner that I am. I have trained, I have done what I can to get to that point and that race is a snapshot of the runner I am on that day, at that time. I should not look back and think what I could have done differently. I should not second guess my training. I am the runner that I am.
And as the days wind down to the race and to the wedding, everything will fall into place. I have to believe that. I need to believe that everything will go smoothly and be wonderful. I need to believe that I will race well and enjoy every step. That I will enjoy every moment.
Meanwhile I am just trying to keep my head above water and not let taper madness completely take me over!